If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.~ John Quincy Adams
Posted by David Towler on Thursday, 04-06-2017 6:32 pm
“I’m sorry but I’ve been really busy” is the most commonly heard excuse in business these days.
Most of us wear many hats at work and at home. We all have deadlines, appointments, meetings and personal things that demand our time. Being busy is a fact of life and many of us are legitimately busy, but we all know someone for whom ‘being busy’ is a chronic excuse. Everyone is busy and none of us are unique in that regard. (more…)
Zoe Evans, Sales And Marketing Specialist
We lack social awareness because we’re so focused on what we’re going to say next, and how what other people are saying, affects us that we completely lose sight of other people.This is a problem because people are complicated. You can’t hope to understand someone until you focus ALL of your attention in his/her direction.
To that end there are some phrases, that emotionally intelligent people are careful to avoid in casual conversation – You should avoid them at all costs.
“You always…” or “You never…”
No one always or never does anything. People don’t see themselves as one-dimensional, so you shouldn’t attempt to define them as such. These phrases make people defensive and closed off to your message, which is a really bad thing because you likely use these phrases when you have something important to discuss.
Instead say: Simply point out what the other person did that’s a problem for you. Stick to the facts. If the frequency of the behavior is an issue, you can always say, “It seems like you do this often.” or “You do this often enough for me to notice.”
“You look tired.”
Tired people are incredibly unappealing — they have droopy eyes and messy hair, they have trouble concentrating, and they’re as grouchy as they come. Telling someone he looks tired implies all of the above and then some.
Instead say: “Is everything okay?” Most people ask if someone is tired because they’re intending to be helpful (they want to know if the other person is okay). Instead of assuming someone’s disposition, just ask. This way, he can open up and share. More importantly, he will see you as concerned instead of rude.
“Good luck.”
This is a subtle one. It certainly isn’t the end of the world if you wish someone good luck, but you can do better because this phrase implies that they need luck to succeed.
Instead say: “I know you have what it takes.” This is better than wishing her luck because suggesting that she has the skills needed to succeed provides a huge boost of confidence. You’ll stand out from everyone else who simply wishes her luck.
“As I said before…”
We all forget things from time to time. This phrase makes it sound as if you’re insulted at having to repeat yourself, which is hard on the recipient (someone who is genuinely interested in hearing your perspective). Getting insulted over having to repeat yourself suggests that either you’re insecure or you think you’re better than everyone else (or both!). Few people who use this phrase actually feel this way.
Instead say: When you say it again, see what you can do to convey the message in a clearer and more interesting manner. This way they’ll remember what you said.
“Well at least I’ve never ___.”
This phrase is an aggressive way to shift attention away from your mistake by pointing out an old, likely irrelevant mistake the other person made (and one you should have forgiven her for by now).
Instead say: “I apologize.” Owning up to your mistake is the best way to bring the discussion to a more rational, calm place so that you can work things out. Admitting guilt is an amazing way to prevent escalation.
“It’s up to you.“ or “Whatever you want.”
While you may be indifferent to the question, your opinion is important to the person asking (or else he wouldn’t have asked you in the first place).
Instead say: ”I don’t have a strong opinion either way, but a couple things to consider are…” When you offer an opinion (even without choosing a side), it shows that you care about the person asking.
“Wow, you’ve lost a ton of weight!”
Once again, a well-meaning comment — in this case a compliment — creates the impression that you’re being critical. Telling someone that she has lost a lot of weight suggests that she used to look fat or unattractive.
Instead say: “You look fantastic.” This one is an easy fix. Instead of comparing how she looks now to how she used to look, just compliment her for looking great. It takes the past right out of the picture.
In everyday conversation, it’s the little things that make all the difference. Try these suggestions out, and you’ll be amazed at the positive response you get.
Louis Carter
-CEO, Chairman and founder, author of Change Champions Field Guide and Best Practices in Talent ManagementOver the past few years, finding loyal employees who also produce beyond everyone’s expectations, has been a hot topic amongst talent professionals and senior executives. The reason you’re seeking this answer is pretty straightforward– you want self-motivated, productive and loyal employees who stay and produce more because they choose to do so. We sought to discover what makes an employee want to produce more for their organizations. And we found the #1 reason why people produce more for their companies is loving their workplace. But how do employees define love?
We surveyed over 175 companies across the US, Middle East/Northern Africa, Europe and SouthEast Asia. We drilled down into what love of company really means to them in order to create a model for a Most Loved Workplace.
Our results were conclusive across geographies, organization size and industries. People who loved their workplaces were 94% more likely to perform better and provide results, with 59% saying they are four times more likely.
Meanwhile, perks, compensation, and friendship at work rated lowest. In fact, commonly discussed impacts like compensation, benefits and perks have very little impact on employees “loving” their workplace. So does having friends at work, which has been central to past studies from other think tanks and research institutes. Our respondents were very clear what causes them to “love” their workplace, and it’s about respect and values.
To help aid in the process, we created an audit which consists of different categories of factors that make people truly love their company including a deeper dive into respect, and other key factors.
The categories are based on 100s of employee definitions of love for their workplace, and how they make a conscious choice to produce more for their organizations as a result:
1. People: This category includes statements designed to measure feelings employees have toward their coworkers and bosses, how they evaluate teamwork and collaboration at their workplace, and communication flows and feedback.
2. Ethics: This category includes statements designed to measure if the employee feels that the company lives the values it espouses along with general perceived honesty, integrity, ethics and if other employees are reliable and held accountable for their actions.
3. Respect and Appreciation: This category includes statements designed to measure if the employee feels respected and appreciated at her workplace along with statements that measure perceived trust and if she feels listened to.
4. Positive Future: This category includes statements designed to measure if the employee thinks of the workplace as a positive environment that fosters innovation and openness along with a general positive attitude toward the future.
5. Achievement: This category includes statements designed to measure if the employee thinks of his workplace as a place that values effort and hard work, a workplace where processes are in place, where the employees can focus on the customer and work toward shared goals.
The resultant data shows that getting respect drives a most loved workplace, and this translates to better performance, team cohesiveness, and reduced turnover. While some companies focus on compensation, promises of friendship, benefits and perks to “buy” employee loyalty, this study finds that a culture of respect for employees is the great equalizer. Respect is the new currency, and one in which any business can supply in unlimited amounts if it so chooses.
If you are interested in our new Most Loved Workplace study and assessment, click here to receive our latest research. You may also hear my presentation for Qualtrics here.
Posted by in Featured Articles
So often we are up against situations we simply cannot control. We tend to focus on the obstacles that get in our way, yet we have no control over them. (more…)
By Hunter Lott, a nationally known staffing and management consultant who operates the HR site HunterLott.com.
Sometimes the choice to fire a worker is a no-brainer. But more often than not, a termination decision isn’t always black and white.Throw in that the always-present legal risks involved, and what may have seemed like an easy decision can get complicated very quickly.
Well, good news: Now there’s a checklist to help you decide when a worker’s behavior is grounds for termination.
Here’s Lott’s “termination questionnaire,” which covers virtually all the factors employers need to consider before cutting an employee loose:
Once you’ve considered all these issues, your company can make an informed decision about whether or not termination’s a good idea.
Just because some problems may come up through this process – say, for instance, the employee has made a recent complaint about his supervisor – you don’t have to reverse the termination decision.
However, it is likely you will need strong documentation that explains the circumstances and management’s rationale for its actions.
Leadership Flagship 